August 2006 - Health And Beauty

Health and Beauty

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Health and Beauty - August 2006

Smile for Black Toothpaste!

August 28th 2006 07:59

Lush Black Tooth Gel

Surprise! It's another wacky product from Lush. I have warily observed this little black tube sitting at the Lush counter until curiosity finally got the better of me. The concept is simple: this rebellious tube challenges the notions of Western society that toothpaste must be minty to be healthy. Like a true rebel, the toothpaste is also charcoal black, while tasting pleasantly sweet and fruity.

The concept of it makes enough sense. Charcoal, despite being black as a pot, has the ability to whiten teeth, the reason for the other ingredient: Eggplant, Tangerine, Lemon, and Sandalwood, fails to be comprehended.

I half expected my mind to be warped by such a truly psyched out idea. Squeezing out a tar slug onto my toothbrush and sloshing it into my mouth in the quest of a whiter, brighter smile, I was disappointed to have ended up with gray teeth instead (ok ok I didn't rinse properly, but I NEVER had to!). Another wad of hard earned cash wasted, when I could have purchased a full MacDonalds Breakfast with hotcakes AND a hash brown.

Other than that, finishing teeth cleaning without the burst of minty freshness that advertisements has trained us to expect just doesn't feel right. My eye twitched as I licked the inside of my mouth as I was deprived my bi-daily bursts of freshness

This is one of the many disastrous purchases I have made from Lush. There was the fizzy bath bomb that dissolved into powdery nothingness and left my 13 yr old self naked, sore, and disappointed without an inch of the promised citrus tang hanging on my skin. There was the natural bar soap that left such a film of greasy residue on my skin I had to resort to Imperial Leather. The most recent pointless purchase scars me to this day, the wobbly seaweed soap which mashed up and jumped out of my hands like some nightmare infant in a bathtub - terrifying ordeal when you're naked and freezing.

I now crawl back to the supermarket Colgate/McLeans isle, head down, tail tucked into my hind-legs, ears flattened, and whimpering pathetically, a little wiser, humbled, and with slightly tarred teeth.

*Image taken from happykatie.typepad.com and is used solely for commentary purposes

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Posted By: Bunbury - Category: Stories

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Who Needs Facial Reconstruction When You Have Wedding Photographers?

August 18th 2006 04:31

I recently received an email titled "Why women insist on taking Wedding Photos" expecting some sort of feminist/chauvinist joke. However what greeted me was a series of before/after pictures reminiscent of that extreme makeover show. Except this time, all that were needed was just some clever lighting and extreme delux pampering.

Through complex logical thought, I have deduced the photographer was probably called Julia, who is also Chinese. Golly she's good.

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Posted By: Bunbury - Category: Stories

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Natural Instinct - The Vegan Way of Beauty

August 17th 2006 04:24

At last I have found a natural beauty range that won't require any real estate as collateral. Natural Instinct makes a huge array of products ranging from conditioner to dish washing liquid that doesn't contain any chemicals or animal derivatives. All that practicality for a bargain price of $20 a litre, you can slap it on all year round, a little more clean, a little more pure, and a little more prosperous.

The stuff feels sort of like home-made jelly that's been left in the sun for too long. However, for that price, who am I to complain? Fragrantly herbal, it foams up like a charm, without containing any of the SLS that makes you dry and flaky. The stuff is so placid and mild you can squirt it onto your eyeballs without getting blinded.

With no animal derivatives, Natural Instinct has also become a favourite among the vegan society. It's so natural I almost want to eat it, after checking that no warnings against consumption was issued on the bottles.

Riding the entrepreneurial dream wave in the organic market, this delightful product has planted itself in heath stores all over Australia. However I wouldn't buy the whole range; something cynically suspicious in me sees the possibilty that you can do your dishes with the shampoo, after splashing some in your salad, and cleaning off that spot in the carpet.....

Household Cleaners

Hair Cleaners

Can you tell them apart?

*images taken from naturalinstinct.com.au and are used to commentary purposes only

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Posted By: Bunbury - Category: Fads

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Roll On Perfume - Aveda Dune

August 16th 2006 07:11

Aveda - Dune Primrose Aroma Concentrate Parfum

This tiny bottle of goodness cannot be fully appreciated until you are trapped in a small confined public space, and somebody releases a lethal dose of digestive gas and having the fart python creep slowly and silently into the deepest cavities of your nostrils.

In such situationes, we must keep in mind that it is not the intention of the gasser to invert the stomachs of the surrounding population. He/she has probably held it in for as long as they could, and a gas overload in one's guts can cause some people to spontaneously combust when coming in contact with heat. It is for this reason that we must endure occasional bursts of baked bean goodness in uncomfortable environments, and why we cannot go without one of these delightful little roll-on perfumes.

Aveda's Dune Primrose Aroma is cleverly compacted into a tiny tube that could pass for lip gloss. When applied to the pulse points, it emits a pleasing fragrance with enough strength to last hours, to leave a prominent trail, without the nausea that many concentrate parfums inflict.

The best part is the discretion in application. So small, and smooth you can glide it all over yourself with a quick flick of the hand. The strong scent fends off any unpleasantness without embarrassing anyone around you. It smells so natural it can even be passed off as pheromones (if you close your eyes and imagine really really ridiculously hard).

The tiny bottle is a bit costly, at around $39.95. However, despite the small quantity, one batch can last years.

*Image taken from www.strawberrynet.com and is used for commentary purposes only

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Posted By: Bunbury - Category: Fragrances

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Multi-Purpose Spray - the Neroli Water

August 15th 2006 05:09

Perfect Potion - Neroli Water

A friend of mine recently presented me with a bottle fresh spritzy neroli water from Perfect Potion. The stuff is basically distilled orange blossom water and is a fragrant ingredient found in many beauty products. It is not until I had accumulated enough idle time at the office before I had discovered how useful this stuff really is.
[ Click here to read more ]

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